Use Somebody
by el winio
Summary: A Jay/Ashley AU one shot Who knew a flat tire could lead to a epic love?
1. A Flat Tire

A AU short story about Jay/Ashley during season 7. Imagine Ashley didn't go on tour with Craig and imagine nothing happened between Jay and Manny except her using him to piss off her dad. A chance meeting leads to something they never expected to find in each other...love.

"Hello? Can someone help me?" Ashley walked around the deserted garage looking for someone to help her with a flat tire. Her mom surprised with the car after her break up with Jimmy. Ashley figured it was the best way a mom could say "Sorry you got dumped for another girl. Hope this makes you feel better." She loved the car and her mom for giving it to her but it still didn't help that familiar sting in her heart whenever she would think of Jimmy. Ashley felt completely alone. She had Ellie but she was gone to collage and so busy with The Core they never saw much of each other. Ashley was wondering lately why she even came back to Degrassi. Maybe it was because she thought Craig would be waiting with open arms but instead his arms were filled with Manny...again. She knew Manny and Craig broke up after the whole coke thing and she wanted to be there for him but Ellie's feelings made that complicated. Ashley walked up to the front desk and hit the bell.

"Hello?" Still nothing. Ashley started tapping the bell repeatedly.

"Alright I hear you." A deep sarcastic voice bellowed from the back of the garage.

Ashley peeked her head around the front desk to see Jay Hogart wearing his garage uniform and oh so familiar backwards cap. Ashley was never friends with Jay but that didn't mean she never noticed him. She had a small crush on his bad boys ways and devilishly made lips but he never showed her interest so he didn't cross her mind...much. Jay went behind the desk and grabbed the bell from Ashley. She noticed the faint smell of weed and figured that was why he was "busy".

"Now that your done breaking in the new bell. What do you need?"

"I have a flat and I'm clueless when it comes to cars. I have a spare just no clue how to get it on."

Jay looked Ashley up and down, licking his bottom lip. The gesture made Ashley blush.

"I know you. Ashley something. You went to Degrassi...oh yeah you dated that Craig guy."

Ashley's smiled dropped. The one thing she always hated was people only remembering her for dating Craig and Jimmy.

"It's Ashley Kerwin and yeah I go to Degarssi it's my senior year." Ashley didn't mentioned the Craig thing hoping he would drop it.

"I remember. Your dating Jimmy now right? Spinner mentioned it once."

" I was but we broke up. Look I'm here about my car not my ex boyfriends. So do you think you can help?"

"Sorry. I can get the tire on in about 20 minutes."

"Great do you guys have a bathroom around here?"

"We usually do but it's busted."

"Well I just need somewhere to change."

"It reeks pretty bad in there."

"Great it only feels like 100 degrees in here." Ashley took off her dark brown denim jacket.

"You can use the employee lounge in the back. I'm the only person here so no one will bust in on you undressing."

"Sure I guess. Let me just grab my bag from the car."

Jay watched Ashley walk away and couldn't help but notice the gentle sway of her hips. She wasn't usually Jay's type but for some reason it felt like Jay was really seeing Ashley for the first time and he liked what he saw. Ashley returned with a black duffel bag slung over her shoulder.

"Here's the keys." She tossed the keys to Jay.

"It's the black Lexus. So where is the lounge?"

"Follow me."

Jay led Ashley to the back of the garage and opened the lounge door.

"I know there are windows everywhere but just pull down the blinds and you will have complete privacy. I'm going to get started on that flat."

"Thank you."

Jay nodded and walked out the room. Ashley walked around pulling the blinds down making sure no one could peek in. She peeked out the door to make sure Jay wasn't peeping. She saw him walking towards her car and figured it was safe. Ashley sat down on a worn out looking green sofa and started tugging off her boots. Next she peeled her stockings off and then propped her legs on the coffee table and laid back letting the fresh air hit her legs. Jay pulled Ashley's car into the garage and then headed to the back for a jack. When he reached the lounge he stopped. He couldn't get the image of one hot Ashley Kerwin undressing out of his mind. He noticed a small tear in one of the blinds so he looked inside. Ashley was sitting on the couch with her head back. Her hair fell over the back of the couch like melted chocolate. Jay licked his bottom lip as he eyed Ashley's legs. They were long, lean and looked buttery soft. Jay's mind went crazy with thoughts of those legs wrapped around his waist or head. Ashley stretched her arms and rose from the couch. She walked over to her duffel bag and pulled out a pink tank top with a black skull on the front, a pair of denim shorts and black flip flops. Ashley began to unbutton her skirt. Jay knew this was wrong but he couldn't stop looking. Ashley shimmed out of her skirt to reveal black and red plaid bikini style panties. Jay gripped the window sill until his knuckles turned white. Ashley lifted her shirt over her head to reveal a matching black and red plaid bra. Jay's mouth went dry. He hadn't seen a body this amazing in awhile. She was toned but with delicate features. She wasn't a stick figure she had curves that wouldn't stop which Jay thought was unbelievably sexy. Jay wanted her...bad. He knew she wasn't the type of girl to have sex at the drop of a hat. It would take some work. As Ashley began to dress Jay pried himself away from the window and headed back to Ashley's car. A few minutes later Ashley emerged from the lounge.

"How does it look" Ashley asked.

"Gorgeous."

"What?"

"Oh uh your car it's gorgeous."

"Thanks." Ashley eyed him oddly.

"I'm almost done."

"Great. So how long have you been working here?"

"A few years."

"Do you ever miss school?"

"Not really and I think it's safe to say school doesn't miss me much either."

"So no regrets after you got kicked out."

Jay knew Ashley was hinting about the shooting and being partially responsible for Jimmy getting shot.

"Nope. No regrets."

"How you do you do it?"

"Do what?"

"Not care?"

Ashley's words hit Jay hard. He did care about what he did to Jimmy and Alex, Emma, Spinner the list went on.

"Sorry I shouldn't have said that."

Jay shrugged his shoulders as he placed the new wheel on.

"Don't worry blue eyes it takes a lot more than that to piss me off."

"Blue eyes?"

"I don't know if you noticed but you have blue eyes."

"I don't know if you noticed but you're quite the smart ass." Ashely smiled.

"Oh you think your the funny one now?"

"I have my moments." They both shared a small laugh.

"So do you still sing?"

Ashley was surprised by the question. She never thought Jay paid any attention to her let alone her singing.

"Yeah I do. I actually have small gig tomorrow night at the pool hall."

"Maybe I'll check it out." Jay tried to sound uninterested but he knew he would be sitting in the front row. Jay adjusted the tire and tightened it on.

"There you go."

Ashley walked around and checked out the tire.

"You are a lifesaver. How much do I owe you?"

Jay looked up at Ashley's bright smile and stunning blue eyes.

"On the house."

"What? No I have to pay you. You did your job it's only fair that I pay you."

"It's fine besides I give freebies to all the hot ladies that roll in from time to time."

Ashley's bright smile dimmed a bit. She couldn't help the twinge of jealousy when he mentioned other girls. She didn't understand why she was jealous but the feeling was there.

"Well lucky me then. At least let me tip you."

"Fine if I have to take your money then I must."

Ashley smiled and pulled a twenty from her pocket. When Jay grabbed the twenty his fingers brushed against Ashley's. Jay held his fingers for a few seconds but it felt like eternity. Ashley's stomach was a hurricane of butterflies. It was a brief touch but never had touching someones fingers felt so intimate. Jay locked eyes with Ashley. He didn't just want her he needed to have her. Jay slowly pulled his hand away and shoved the money into his pocket.

"Thanks."

"No problem."

They stood in silence staring at each other. The sexual tension was practically crackling around them.

"Um you have my keys." Ashley let out a nervous laugh.

Jay pulled the keys from his pocket and extended his hand to hers. His heart was racing at the thought of touching her one last time. Ashley grabbed the keys and once again touched Jay's fingers. This time Jay didn't play around. He dropped the keys and grabbed Ashley's hand lacing his fingers through hers. The warm frisson that flowed between them was electric. Both their breaths held as they inched closer.

"I'm not sure what is happening here." Ashley whispered.

"Ne neither but I'm sure this feels pretty damn good."

"Really good."

Jay held Ashley's gaze as he placed his other hand on her hip and pulled her against him.

"I don't usually let guys I barely know touch me like this."

"I know. So I say thank you for letting me hold you like this."

Jay used every amount of restraint to not throw her on the hood of the car and fuck her right there. He knew he had to go slow with Ashley. He was never for hand holding or being lovey dovey with girls. He found it boring and pointless since they were mostly for sex but holding Ashley's hand, exchanging intimate glances, the sexual chemistry he could feel between them he yearned to know what it would be like to have Ashley be more then just a good time. He had gotten this close and the thought of never touching her again left a unsettling knot in Jay's stomach.

"I shouldn't say this because it's crazy. We barely know each other but...well. Is it wrong that I want you to kiss me right now?"

Jay responded by bringing his lips to hers. The kiss was soft and slow. Ashley felt like someone clicked a light on inside her. She never felt anything like this before when she kissed Jimmy or Craig. Her kisses with Jimmy and Craig were wonderful and filled with love but with Jay Ashley was feeling a million things at once. Fear, excitement, passion, danger, lust it was swallowing her in. She had been feeling so unwanted and the way Jay would look at her and the way he was kissing her made the gnawing hollowness inside her go away. He gripped her tightly and deepened the kiss letting his tongue play with hers. Her lips tasted like peaches and her breath was minty sweet. Jay knew if one of them didn't stop soon things would go further. As if Ashley sensed his thoughts she slowly broke the kiss. Their foreheads pressed together as they let out ragged breaths.

"Wow." Was all Ashley could say.

"Yeah that was wow."

They remained pressed together not wanting to let go of the amazing feeling of being so close.

"One of us has to let go." Ashley laughed.

" I don't think I can."

Ashley's heart tugged from the honesty in his voice. As much as Ashley didn't want this random but wonderful experience to end she slowly backed out of Jay's arms.

"This is really weird."Ashley said.

"Very weird but a good weird."

They shared a smile that quickly turned seductive. Jay's eyes were all over Ashley and she feel her body go warm from his intense gaze.

"I should get going."

"Should you?"

Jay wanted her to stay but Ashley feared what she might do if she stayed any longer. Ashley picked up her keys and backed up against her.

"I should. I should go before we..." Ashley trailed off realizing what she was about to say.

Jay licked his bottom lip and walked up to Ashley, pinning her against the car.

"Before what?" Jay's voice came out low and rough.

Ashley felt her bones turn to liquid and she couldn't help the moan like sigh that escaped her lips. Jay's face grew hard and Ashley could feel another part of him getting hard too.

"Wait! We should stop. I mean I don't want to but we should. I just got dumped, my mind is a mess and I don't want to lead you on if this is just some fling to make me feel better about myself."

"Does this feel like a fling to you?" Jay asked.

"I'm not sure. I haven't had one before. Have you?"

"Oh I have had flings before but ,fuck it never felt like this."

"I really should go."

"You keep saying that."

"Well I would move but you have me pinned."

Jay smiled and stepped away from Ashley.

"Thanks again for the flat. Maybe I'll see you around."

Ashley turned to get in her car when Jay grabbed her arm and flipped her around.

"When can I see you again?"

"Jay do you really think we should pursue this?"

"Hell yes."

Ashley laughed.

"Please I want to see you again."

Ashley bit down on her bottom lip. She wasn't sure what was happening between them but she knew she didn't want this to be their last time together.

"Okay. Come to my show tomorrow night we can hang out after."

"Can't wait blue eyes."

Next Chapter Coming Soon!


	2. The Pool Hall

The Next Night

Ashley sat nervously waiting as the act on stage finished his last song. Ashley was never a nervous performer but with the idea that Jay might show up to see her sing she couldn't help her nerves. She had been thinking about him the moment she left the garage. Yesterday felt so unreal Ashley was wondering if it was all a dream but then she would remember their hands intwined together and the kiss that made her feel on fire. Ashley shivered in delight.

"Ash!"

Ashley turned to see Ellie running towards her with Marco walking behind her. Ellie jumped into Ashley's arms.

"I haven't seen you in weeks!" Ellie squealed.

Ashley felt relief knowing her best friend was there to support her. Ellie backed away from Ashley and looped her arm around Marco's when he approached. Ashley always thought it was to bad Marco was gay because he and Ellie were so close.

"Hey Ash. How is Degrassi's next big rising musical star?"

"I'm good not sure about being Degrassi's next big star but good."

"I'm so happy we could see you tonight. I haven't seen you sing onstage in forever." Ellie beamed.

"It has been awhile. So how is The Core.?"

"Busy. I haven't had a day off in months but honestly I'm loving every single second."

"When she isn't complaining about headaches, finger cramps, horrendous writers. Should I go on Elenore?"

"Ignore him. He's just jealous because I look cuter then he does tonight."

"Ha! You wish."

"I don't have to wish for something that I know to be true."

Ellie and Marco started going back and forth, fighting over who looked best. They reminded Ashley of an old married couple. Ashley was about to break up the fashion quarrel when the front doors of the pool hall swung open. Ashley held her breath as Jay walked in. He was wearing dark denim jeans, a maroon colored shirt, black jacket and his backwards cap. Ashley couldn't believe she went from never really thinking about Jay to wanting to jump his bones the moment she saw him. Jay's eyes instantly found Ashley's. Everything seemed to fade in the background for Ashley. Ellie and Marco bickering, the musician on stage even the heavy clouds of cigarette smoke that blanketed the pool hall. All she saw was him. Jay held Ashley's eyes as his stomach spun like a tornado. He had been dying to see her again. Jay smiled at Ashley and she returned the smile with a sexy wink. Jay's heart started racing. She still wanted him which brought Jay more joy then he expected. Like a moth drawn to a flame he headed towards Ashley.

"I'll be right back." Ashley said as she walked past Marco and Ellie.

"Ash? Where are you going?" Ellie called out but Ashley kept walking towards Jay.

Jay drank Ashley in. Her long curly hair was as gorgeous as ever and Jay's fingers twitched at the thought of touching it. She was wearing black skinny jeans, a low cut grey shirt, and a assortment of black necklaces. She looked edgy and sexy. Jay's mind went crazy thinking about what she was wearing underneath. They walked up to each other until they were inches apart.

"Hi." Ashley said in a breathy voice.

"Hey. I hope you don't mind me saying but you look fucking amazing."

Eyes wide, Ashley laughed.

"Um no. I guess I don't mind."

"I hope I'm not tearing you away from your friends."

Ash looked over to see Ellie and Marco with utter shock and confusion written all over their faces.

"I'm sure they will question me to death later."

"What are you going to tell them?"

"Not sure. I guess I haven't been thinking about that."

Jay inched closer and leaned his mouth against Ashley's ear.

"What have you been thinking about?"

"Doing things I shouldn't be doing with someone I shouldn't be doing them with."

"Tell me what things." Jay grabbed Ashley's wrist.

Ashley went still.

"Jimmy."

Jay quickly looked at Ashley.

"What?"

"Jimmy is here." Ashley stepped away from Jay.

Jay noticed the dramatic change in Ashley when she saw Jimmy. Her once bright eyes dimmed sadly, her sexy smile fell and body became rigid and tense. He suddenly felt protective of Ashley as she showed her vulnerable side. She seemed 10 times smaller all because of one jerk.

"I didn't know he was coming." She said through gritted teeth.

Jay grabbed Ashley's hand.

"Don't let him get to you."

Ashley rolled her eyes.

"And how do I do that?"

Jay looked back at Jimmy, who was joined by Spinner, and noticed Jimmy's eyes were on them. Jay smiled at Jimmy then looked back at Ashley.

"Like this."

He pulled Ashley against him and kissed her. Ashley went still at first but when he dug his hands into her hair she quickly relaxed and started kissing him back. Jay felt a huge wave of relief when Ashley kissed him back. He was worried she would push him away because of Jimmy. Jay loved the feeling of Ashley's hair in his hands. It was incredibly soft and smelled like roses and lavender. It had only been 24 hours and Jay was falling hard for Ashley. It had become more then just wanting to have sex with her. He wanted her all to himself and he wanted her to feel the same way about him. Every time he was near her every cell in his body would come alive. He didn't care if she was still getting over Jimmy. He would rather have Ashley use him then never be able to be close to her again. Ashley knew the kiss was for pissing off Jimmy but at that moment Jimmy was the last thing on her mind. She grabbed a fistful of his jacket and deepened the kiss.

"Next up we have singer Ashley Kerwin."

Jay broke the kiss.

"Fuck I love doing that." Jay smiled.

"Me too." Ashley smiled back.

"Ashley Kerwin to the stage please."

"Guess I should get up there."

Jay tucked a strand of hair behind Ashely's ear.

"Break a leg blue eyes."

Ashley rolled her eyes and headed for the stage. Jay looked back at Jimmy and he didn't look very pleased. Jay gave him a sheepish smile and sat at one of the tables in the front row. He glanced to see Marco and Ellie glaring at Jay while they shared whispers. Jay shrugged it off. He wasn't there for them.

"So how long have you and Ash been hooking up?" Spinner sat down in a chair across from Jay.

"We aren't hooking up."

"Really. So that hot makeout session I just witnessed was all in my head.?"

"What do you Spin? Oh wait Jimmy sent you over here didn't he?"

"No but he doesn't like seeing you with Ash."

"Last I checked he dumped Ashley for someone else. He doesn't exactly have the right to care about who Ashley kisses anymore."

"Not the point dude. Jimmy still doesn't want to see Ashely get hurt and face it you have a pretty bad track record with the ladies."

"It's different this time."

"Yeah right. Let me guess you really like her and can't wait to meet the folks." Spinner laughed but Jay's face remained serious.

"Oh shit. You do like her."

"Is that such a fucking shock? That I might actually like someone. That maybe I'm sick of all the games and acting like fake ass player. Yeah I like Ashley...a lot. Who fucking cares? Jimmy can piss off and so can anyone else who doesn't approve because I'm not going to stop see Ashley anytime soon."

Spinner sat stunned not sure what to say. Jay was never one to lay out his feelings for anyone.

"Sorry dude. I can see that you really like her."

"Whatever Spin. Tell Jimmy I said hi." Spinner got up from the table and walked away from the table.

"Ladies and gentlemen. Ashley Kerwin."

The audience started clapping and Marco and Ellie started shouting Ashley's name as they jumped up and down. Ashley walked onstage waving to everyone, her smile beaming brightly. With a guitar in hands she sat down on a single stool that was placed onstage. She propped up the guitar and locked eyes with Jay.

"This one is dedicated to a certain mechanic who is great with flat tires."

Jay felt the eyes of Jimmy, Spinner, Ellie and Marco all on him so he gave them his cheesiest grin. Ashley started playing and Jay reconized the song. It was Use Somebody by Kings of Leon.

"I was roaming around looking down at all I see."

Ashley's voice was low and seductive as Jay watched mesmerized.

"You know that I could use somebody yea. Someone like you."

Ashley held Jay's eyes and imagined he was the only one there. This was just for him and only him. Ashley finished the song and the audience loved her. Ellie and Marco were bouncing like jumping beans and they rooted Ashley on. Ashley bowed to the stage and made her exit. Ellie and Marco ran to meet Ashley off stage.

"That was amazing Ash. You sounded beautiful." Marco hugged her.

"Thanks Macro."

"It was amazing Ash but what really amazed me is that you just made out and serenaded Jay freaking Hogart."

"Ellie it's not a big deal."

"What! Not a big deal? You don't just have a steamy makeout session then sing to the guy and say it's no big deal. How long has this been going on?"

"Um...yesterday."

Ellie and Marco looked at each other then back at Ashley.

"You guys are overreacting. It's nothing serious."

"Okay then what is it?" Ellie asked.

Ashley looked at Jay. He was smiling right at her.

"It's nice okay."

"It's nice?"

"Sorry Ash you know she doesn't get out much anymore. Come on Ell we have a English finale tomorrow and I could use a late night study cram."

"Fine but don't think this is over Ash. We have some serious girl talk to do."

"Yes ma'am." Ashley said sternly.

Ellie and Marco looped arms and trotted away.

"Hey Ash."

Ashley's spine stiffened at the sound of his Jimmy's voice. Ashley turned to face him.

"Hey Jimmy."

"You were great tonight."

"Thanks."

"How have you been? I know I see you at school but we don't talk much anymore."

"We broke up remember? You left me for someone else Jimmy. Sorry if being chatty with you wasn't the first thing on my mind."

"It seems Jay Hogart has been on your mind."

"Why do you care."

"Because I want to see you happy and Jay is only going to hurt you."

"I don't have to listen to this or you and if you wanted to see me happy maybe you shouldn't have smashed my heart to pieces." Ashley turned to walk away from Jimmy but he grabbed her arm.

"You won't even talk to me anymore?"

"Let go Jimmy."

"No. Not until you hear me out."

"Jimmy let go."

Suddenly Jay appeared and knocked Jimmy's hand off Ashley's arm. He wrapped his arm around Ashely's waist and pulled her against him.

"I think you should back off Jimmy. It's obvious Ashley doesn't want to talk to you right now and I really don't like seeing your hands on her so why don't you leave."

Ashley scooted closer to Jay.

"Whatever. Nice talking to you Ash." Jimmy sneered then wheeled away.

Jay gently kissed Ashley's forehead.

"You okay?"

"Yeah I'm fine. Better now."

Jay looped his other arm around Ashley and turned to face her.

"You were pretty freaking amazing tonight. The shoutout was a nice subtle touch."

"I had a feeling you would like that. Sorry about Jimmy."

"Don't be. I like fighting for something I want."

Ashley's heart was beating a mile a minute as Jay's thumb went under her shirt and he started rubbing in slow circles on her skin.

"Do you think this all seems a little fast? Maybe even rushed." Ashley asked.

"Hell yes but it feels natural with you. I don't feel awkward or uncomfortable with you. It's sounds lame but I feel like we have this unspoken connection. We don't need to say much to see that there is something between us. I know it sounds stupid."

"No it doesn't. If anything you just read my mind."

Ashley brought her lips to his. The kiss was achingly tender as Jay cupped her cheek with one hand and the other still making small cirlces on her skin. Ashley wrapped her arms around Jay's neck and pressed herself against him as tightly as she could. She wanted this feeling to never stop. Jay broke the kiss and starting trailing kisses down Ashley's neck. Ashley moaned as Jay begin nipping lightly on her earlobe.

"Tell me you want me."

"I want you." Ashley whispered quickly

Jay pulled away and looked at Ashley. Her eyes were glazed with desire, her face was a blushing a lovely shade of pink and her hair was falling in her face. Jay felt a tightening in his groin.

"You want to get out of here?" Jay asked.

"Hell yes."

Jay laughed.

"Oh great I'm already corrupting you."

Ashley rolled her eyes and stepped out of Jay's arms.

"I'm not as innocent as you think." She said with a wink.

"Let me just get my stuff and we can go."

Jay watched her walk away. He was becoming anxious as hell thinking about getting some private time with Ashley.

"Jay Hogart."

The sound of Manny's voice was like a cold bucket of water just got dumped on his head. He gritted his teeth and turned to face her.

"Manny. Nice running into you." Jay lied.

Jay and Manny had a small fling a few weeks ago. She basically used him to piss daddy off and when she got what she wanted from Daddy she kicked Jay to the curb.

"You're looking good Jay." Manny's eyes roamed over Jay.

"Thanks. You too."

"So it seems you and Ashley Kerwin are a thing now."

"We're friends."

"Looks serious for being just friends."

"What do you want Manny?"

"Maybe I want a certain mechanic to take a look under my hood." Manny inched closer. Jay smelled liquor on her breath as she coyly inched her skirt up higher.

"Look Manny it was fun while it lasted so but I don't want you. So go find someone else to use."

Ashley was heading back to Jay when she saw him talking to Manny. She crept up next to them and hide behind some speakers as she listened in.

"You're turning me down?"

"I know you're not used to rejection but yes I'm turning your ass down."

"You think your better because you managed to sink Ashley into your claws? Please Jay. We both know you are playing her like a fiddle. You get girls to fall for you, fuck them and then ditch them. How long before you get bored with her or how long before you hurt her like every other girl? Deep down you know you aren't good enough for Ashley. This is just a challenge for you. Admit it you don't care one ounce for her."

"Fine! I don't care about her. She is hot and looks like a good fuck. As soon as I get her to lose the whole good girl routine I'll fuck her then get her emo ass out of my life. Happy now Manny."

Manny shook her head.

"God Jay you are so pathetic." Manny flipped her long glossy black hair and swievled away. Jay was sick with everything that just came out of his mouth.

"So I look like a good fuck huh?"

Jay wheeled around to find Ashley standing behind him her eyes rimming with tears.

"No Ashley I didn't mean it."

"I can't believe I fell for every single line you fed me."

"I only said that to shut Manny up. I'm crazy about you."

"Bullshit! If you were so damn crazy about me you would have told Manny that. If you really cared you would never say those things about me."

Jay opened his mouth and nothing came out because he knew she was right. He was to much of a coward to admit his real feelings for Ashley.

"I think we should end things now."

"Ashley please don't."

"For a moment I was starting to think maybe this was it. Maybe you were actually different from the rest. Thank you so much for proving me wrong."

Ashley turned and bolted out the door but Jay was hot on her heels.

"Ashley! Ashley! Please let me explain."

Jay grabbed her hand.

"Don't touch me." Ashley yelled as fresh tears ran down her face.

"Look I'm sorry about what I said to Manny. I swear I didn't mean it. I care about you Ashley. I don't know why but I feel closer to you then any other girl I've known.

"But you can't even say that to Manny? I dedicated a song to you tonight and kissed you in front of my ex and best friend. I just don't think you feel anything remotely close to what I thought I felt for you."

Jay grabbed Ashley and roughly pressed his lips to hers. Ashley struggled in his arms as he kissed her in fear it would be the last time. Ashley pushed him off and stared at him.

"Stay away from me Jay. This was a mistake from the start."

Ashley got in her car and sped away taking Jay's heart with her.


	3. One Week Later

One week later...

Ashley was staring at the clock on the wall watching the minutes tick by. She was patiently waiting for the sixth period bell to ring so she could hurry home. Her last class was brutal because she sat right next to Jimmy. They hadn't spoke to each other since the night at the pool hall. Every time Ashley thought of that night a massive lump would settle in her throat making to hard to breathe. Jay didn't try contacting Ashley, which for her, further proved he only wanted sex from her. As soon as the bell rang Ashley bolted for the door. She was practically running when she heard Jimmy call her name.

"Ash! Wait up!"

Ashley knew she couldn't ignore him forever. She was stuck in this school until she graduated. She wasn't sure if she had the patience to outrun Jimmy for the rest of the year. She stopped and turned.

"What's up Jimmy? I 'm kind of in a rush."

"Look I wanted to say I'm really sorry for how I acted the night at the pool hall."

"It's fine Jimmy."

"No it's not. I way overstepped my boundaries. I just want to see you happy to Ash and I know we aren't together anymore but I still worry about you. Before you say don't I know I shouldn't worry about because you're strong and if Jay is what makes you happy then I'm happy for you."

Ashley put her hand on her chest suddenly feeling out of breath.

"Thanks Jimmy but don't worry about me and Jay it was nothing serious. It's already over."

"Oh I thought you guys were serious. I mean the way you guys were looking at each other it seemed a little intense."

The lump in Ashley's throat kept getting bigger cutting off her air and making her dizzy.

"I gotta go Jimmy. I'll see you later."

Ashley turned a corner and ran as fast as she could. She fled down the hallways and flew out the entrance of the school. She didn't stop running until she reached her car. She leaned against her car and let out huge gasps like air. She felt like someone had been holding her underwater and she finally came up for air. Her lungs burned as tears stung her eyes. She missed him. She missed him so much it hurt. She hated that he had such a profound affect on her that she had become a panic attack having mess since that night. She closed her eyes as the familiar gnawing hollowness clawed at her insides. She felt empty, unwanted and mainly pathetic. She missed Jay so much even though all he wanted was to use her. She took deep breaths as she felt air return to her lungs. She wiped the tears from her eyes and unlocked her car. She tossed her backpack in the backseat and got in the car. She was closed the door and was about to the key in the ignition when something caught her eye. A small white envelope was stuck under one of her windshield wipers. She let out a annoyed sigh thinking it was from Jimmy. She got out of the car and grabbed the envelope. She opened and pulled out a piece of paper. Her stomach dropped.

"_Ash it's Jay. I really want to talk to you. Please call me anytime. I miss you blue eyes."_

Ashley's heart clenched in her chest. She wanted to call him him but she couldn't bring herself to do it. Ashley didn't want to think of Jay hurting her again. She has already had her heart broken to many times and feared Jay could turn it to dust. Not wanting to think of a future of pain Ashley crumbled up the paper and tossed it in her backseat. As she got back into her car her cell went off. Ellie's number lit up the phone.

"Hey Ell."

"Hey Ash. What's wrong you sound down."

"Nothing. I'm fine just tired. I was thinking about grabbing some coffee at The Dot. Wanna join me?"

"Yes! Anything is better then the sludge they have at The Core."

"Great. See you Ell."

Jay sat in his apartment waiting for his cell to go off. He prayed Ashley would call after the note he left her. He had been a complete mess since the night at the pool hall. He couldn't stop thinking about her. He even tried to go out and look for another girl but he couldn't even bring himself to talk to a single girl because they weren't what he wanted. He felt like a jerk for not telling Manny to piss off because he actually cared about someone. Ashley had laid her heart out on the line by being honest and showing everybody she didn't give a shit about their disapproval. Jay felt like a coward. Maybe he didn't deserve Ashley. Maybe she was better off without him. His cell suddenly went off. He nearly dropped the phone as he answered it.

"Ashley?"

"So I'm guessing she hasn't called?"

Jay let out a sigh of disappointment.

"What do you want Spin?"

"I wanted to see how you were doing."

"Aw thanks for checking in mom."

"Anything for my boy."

"I'm fine okay no need for the check ups."

"Dude why don't you just come down to the The Dot will hang out and then do something after my shift. You have been like a freaking hermit man."

"I'm not sure if I'm in the mood for a bromantic night Spin."

Spinner went silent for a few seconds.

"So there isn't anything I can do to convince you to come out of your shell?"

"Nope. Sorry man."

"Not even if I said Ashley Kerwin just walked in looking beautiful and it looked like she might be staying awhile."

"Are you screwing with me?"

"I guess you will have to come and find out."

Spinner hung up. Jay quickly got off the couch. He grabbed his jacket, slapped on his backwards cap and took his keys. He flew down the stairs and quickly got into his car. His nerves started to kick in on his drive over there. He wasn't even sure what he was going to say to her. He wondered if she would even listen. He finally reached The Dot and as he saw her car in the parking lot his heart started pounding like a drum. He got out of his car and stood in front of The Dot. This was his only chance to tell Ashley how he really felt. To say all the words he had been wishing to tell her. The thought of letting someone in terrified him. To let someone see he wasn't a bad ass all the time that he could actually be a decent person. He always felt safe having a wall built around him but somehow Ashley managed to bust down every insecure wall he ever built. He took a deep breath.

"Man up Hogart." He repeated as he walked through the doors.

Short I know but the next chapter which will be the last will be epic greatness!


	4. One Last Chance

The final chapter I hope everyone enjoys the ending

"So how is work?" Ashley asked Ellie

"Nothing compared to the news I have for you."

"Good or bad?"

"Not sure. It took me by surprise."

"Don't leave me hanging Ell. What is it."

"Sean came to see me yesterday."

"Sean Cameron Sean?"

"The one and only."

"The last time you saw him was when he left for Wasaga right?"

"Yep. It felt so surreal to see him standing in front of me. He has changed so much Ash."

"Why did he come to see you?"

"To see how I was and maybe ask me out to dinner." Ellie beamed.

"I'm hoping you said yes."

"Of course. A part of me always missed Sean. He was my first love and you never really get over your first love. Seeing him brought back so many memories of when I was truly happy. When I didn't need my rubber bands. We held each other together. The shooting was to much for Sean and as much as it hurt me when he left I eventually understood. Sean needed his family. I understand that now."

"I'm really happy for you Ell."

"Thanks. Enough about me I have been dying to know about you and Jay Hogart."

Ashley tried to hide the wince on her face at the mention of his name.

"Nothing on that front."

"Come on Ash you guys were acting like you where on your honeymoon."

"I thought he was into me but it turned out he was into what was in my pants more."

"Oh God Ash. I'm so sorry. You deserve someone better than that."

"You gotta kiss a few frogs before you meet your prince right?" Ashley said sadly.

"You liked him a lot didn't you?"

Ashley tried swallowing the growing lump in her throat."

"Um yeah I did. He was...being with him made me feel not so...hollow. He filled this hole in my heart that had been there since..."

"Jimmy?"

"No Craig."

Ellie's face tightened and she looked down. It happened every time someone would mention his name.

"It's okay Ellie I don't hate you for having feelings for Craig."

"You should I'm your best friend."

"I was angry and hurt at first but then Craig chose Manny over you and lied to you about the drugs. I realized I know what it is like to have strong feelings for Craig then have him smash them to pieces."

"I can't believe how spineless he made me."

"You loved him. You wanted to believe he could love you back. Love makes people insane."

"Uber insane." They both laughed.

"I miss this Ash. Me and you chatting like school girls."

"Me too Ell. You have always been my best friend."

"Oh stop before I get tears in my latte."

They both broke into giggles when Ellie's phone went off. She pulled it from her purse. As she looked at the number a huge grin spread over her face.

"It's Sean isn't?"

"Yes but I can call him later. It's girl time."

"As your best friend I'm ordering you to answer your phone."

"Ash..."

"If you don't answer it I will."

Ellie smiled and flipped open the phone.

"Hey Sean. Just give me a sec."

Ellie mouthed a be right back to Ashley and headed out the back entrance. Ashley always believed deep down Sean and Ellie were meant to be. They were kindred spirits that always brought out the best in each other. She was thrilled for them both and really hoped they could make it work but her happiness for Ellie did nothing for the hole in her heart. She still felt empty. She still missed him. She closed her eyes as her chest started tightening and her breathe caught in her throat.

"Is this seat taken?"

Ashley felt every once of panic release from her body at the sound of his voice. She opened her eyes and Jay was standing in front of the chair Ellie was sitting in. Ashley hated that she couldn't stop looking at him but she missed the sight of him. He looked tired like he hadn't slept in awhile making him seem stressed. Ashley wanted to punch herself for the concern she felt for him. Jay drank in the sight of her. Her long hair fell in loose curls around her face. She was wearing dark denim skinny jeans, a low cut black t shirt and a pair of hot red heels. She looked amazing just like every time before.

"So is this seat taken?"

Ashley finally found her voice.

"Yeah it's taken and even if it wasn't I wouldn't want you sitting there."

"Fair enough but I think we should talk."

"I don't."

"So I don't get to tell my side of the story? That's not very fair blue eyes."

"Please don't call me that." Ashley said with pain in her voice.

"Let me just say what I have to say. If you don't want anything to do with me after I talk I will leave you alone for good."

"Fine." Ashley whispered.

Jay sat down and pulled off his cap. Ashley couldn't help but notice how he managed to look innocent and insanely gorgeous at the same time as he ran his hands through his dark hair. He put his cap back on, took a deep breathe and looked her in the eye.

"You look beautiful today." He smiled.

"Thank you. You look tired."

"I haven't been getting much sleep."

"Been busy?" Ashley asked bitterly thinking Jay was "busy" with other girls.

"If being busy means missing the hell outta of you blue eyes then yeah I have been pretty fucking busy."

"Please don't call me blue eyes."

"Why? Because you might actually like the sound of me saying it?"

"Why are you doing this to me? I'm nothing but a good looking fuck remember?"

"I'm sorry you heard that I really am. I'm sorry you didn't hear me say I'm falling for you Ashley. I can't imagine being with someone who isn't you and that all I want is to be with you and make you happy because that is what you make me."

"I want to believe you Jay I really do."

"Why can't you? Did Craig and Jimmy fuck you over so bad that you can't trust a guy anymore?" Jay regretted his word as anger and hurt flooded Ashley's eyes.

"I'm sorry I shouldn't have said that."

"Well you seem to have a habit of saying things you shouldn't and as for Craig and Jimmy that is none of you business."

"I wasn't planning on this to go so badly."

"How did you think it would go?"

Jay laid his hand on the table leaving it available for Ashley to take if you decided to give him a chance.

"Ash please give me a chance. I swear I won't hurt you like Jimmy or Craig did. I can't even imagine wanting to be with someone who isn't you. I know I'm a mess but being with you makes me feel like I could actually clean myself up a bit and get a real life. Please don't throw us away when you know deep down we should be together."

Ashley was fighting the tears that were trying to cascade down her face. She had been hurt so many times before. What if he did do they same things that Craig and Jimmy did? What if he didn't? Maybe he was the one guy who genuinely wanted to be only with her. She stared at his hand then back at him.

"Ash are you okay?"

Ellie was standing at the table with her arms crossed over her chest. Ashley looked at Jay.

"I'm fine. Jay was just leaving."

Jay's face crumbled and Ashley felt horrible for causing that look on his face. He pulled his hand away and got up from the chair. Ashley felt her airwaves begin to close up again.

"I guess I'll be going then. I promise to leave you Ash. I'm really sorry about everything."

He walked around the table standing in front of Ashley. He brought his knuckles to her cheek.

"I'll miss you blue eyes."

Ashley held her breath and closed her eyes as his knuckles stroked her cheek. She felt peace within this simple touch. Just the gentle grazing of his knuckles across her cheek gave her the most peaceful happiness she had ever known. He dropped his hand and walked out the front entrance.

"Ash?"

Ashley finally opened her eyes. She felt numb and skin Jay had just touched went from feeling alive to cold and dead. Ellie sat down.

"Are you okay? You look pretty shaken up."

Ashley wasn't listening. She was staring at the front doors feeling like she was drowning. Her heart was screaming "Why did you let him go!" Ashley felt a painful squeeze in her chest. She wanted Jay back touching her cheek releasing all her panic and stress. She needed him and she just blew him off.

"Ashley would you look at me and tell me you're okay."

Ellie shook Ashley's arm snapping her attention back to Ellie.

"I gotta go." Ashley sat up.

"Ash wait. Are you sure you want to go after him?"

"Yes Ellie I'm pretty damn sure."

Ashley hugged Ellie and kissed her cheek.

"Wish me luck Ell."

She ran out the doors and bolted for the parking lot. She almost fell on her ass as she made a sharp turn turning the corner of the building but that wouldn't stop her. She reached the parking lot and saw Jay about to get in his car.

"Jay!" Ashley yelled.

Jay's head quickly turned in Ashley's direction. Ashley suddenly felt like her legs were glued to the ground.

"I'm sorry." She yelled.

Jay rolled his eyes and walked over to her. He stopped a few inches away from her.

"Sorry for what?"

"I'm not sure. I just thought sorry was the right thing to say."

"You have nothing to be sorry for I'm the one that screwed up."

"Maybe I screwed up by not believing you. I assumed the worst because that's all I'm used to. Between Craig and Jimmy I gave up on trusting guys. Just like your scared to admit your feelings I'm scared to actually have them because that would mean you could hurt me."

"I won't Ash. If you gave me the chance I could show you how much I want to be with you. I wouldn't hurt you like they did."

"I don't want to lose you." Ashley said as a single tear trailed down her cheek.

Jay let out a huge sigh of relief.

"I don't want to lose you either. Will you give me a chance?"

"Hell yes!"

Ashley jumped into his arms and wrapped her legs around his waist. He hugged her tightly inhaling her rose and lavender scent.

"I've missed you like crazy."

"I missed you too blue eyes."

Jay placed her down and kissed her. The kiss was passionate and Jay branded his lips against Ashley's. They both wondered deep down if what they were feeling at that moment was love. They wouldn't say it out loud but they knew it was love they were feeling. Ashley finally found the guy who truly wanted to be with just her and Jay finally found the girl that made him want to be a better man. Ashley broke the kiss and laid her head against Jay's neck.

"How about you get outta here. We have some lost time to make up for."

Jay kissed her forehead and grabbed her hand lacing his with hers.

"Whatever you want blue eyes."

THE END


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